Unquiet
Things

Don’t do it, Eleanor told the little girl; insist on your cup of stars; once they have trapped you into being like everyone else you will never see your cup of stars again.

I recall seeing Sofia Zakia’s Her Cup Of Stars necklace some time last year on Instagram and being utterly transfixed by its diminutive brilliance. A tiny, golden cup, chipped but perfect, featuring hand-engraved stars, a wee crescent moon, and a petite constellation of diamonds, “twinkling just for you.” A glimmering reminder to be wisely, bravely, true to one’s self.

Every time I call to mind this symbolic cup, its metaphorical stars, and this quote from Shirley Jackson’s The Haunting Of Hill House–which is quite often recently, considering the success of the Netflix series and the subsequent resurgence in popularity of the original novel–I reflect on the small sacrifices and surrenders I make in my everyday existence, just to make things easier on myself, or, all the instances I have had to capitulate or acquiesce to avoid the things that may be much, much worse. How, since I was a child, I’ve been giving up pieces of myself–tiny things really, so small you’d barely notice. A chip here, a chip there. My outrageous imagination, reigned. My silliness, silenced. The expansive, ever-present fantasy lands of my young daydreams are landscapes I can now barely conjure even in deepest slumber. And, of course, I know that these small slivers of self, lost, are not unique to me– you are, no doubt, cracked and splintered, as well. You’ve been trapped like we all have been–by adulthood, and expectations, and responsibility; fitting in and giving up and losing out; doing what you must to survive in this world, for as long as you have been, and for as long as you can.

And so, sometimes, we need reminders. Of who we once were. Of all we thought we could do. Of all that we thought life could be! Of our cup of stars, which we yearn to hold again and from which we dream to drink deeply. And sometimes, these reminders visit us in the form of a golden trinket or talisman, and we might pair such a reminder with all of the things which made us happy as a child before that cup of stars was wrenched from our little fingers.

How would I pair such a reminder? With lots of purples–on my dresses and lips. Lacy veils with ears! Pocketbooks with ladies’ faces on them! Fancy knickers! Which I obviously didn’t wear as a child, but I was very keen to grow up and wear them. And the most ridiculously gorgeous, iridescent footwear we can get our weird little feet into! H/t to Sonya, by the way, with regard to these shoes. I think Sonya owns, like four pair by now–that’s some cloven-hooved commitment! (I know, I know, they’re tabi boots. I’m taking some “cup of stars poetic license” here.) Not pictured below, but worth mentioning: artist Laurel Whitting also makes a lovely “cup of stars” necklace–and I believe she currently has a few in her Etsy shop! [EDIT: I believe these are sold out]

..as an FYI, playing with fancy frocks and jewelry is one of the cup of stars-iest things that I do!

LOVESHACKFANCY maxi dress // Maison Margiela Tabi Ankle Boot // Alexander McQueen “Queen and King” box clutch // Maison Michel Lace Ears Hair Band // Sofia Zakia Her Cup Of Stars pendant // Unearthen Quartz Limarens Ring // Else Lolita Bodysuit // LUSH Amalie Mae perfume // Bite Taro lipstick (this is sold out, so I’ve linked you to eBay. Or find a dupe and report back here!)

BONUS! You may not ever find your cup of stars. That’s life, I guess. At that point, what do you do? You follow your abyss, that’s what you do.

Voidmerch Follow Your Abyss T-shirt // Comme Des Garçons Girl pleated pinafore skirt // Embellished ankle boots // Bluebella Luisa bra // Bluebella Saffy brief // Versace Medusa Head clutch // Alain Mikli sunglasses // UNUM Symphonie Passion perfume // Gerbe black knee-highs // Goldengrove Toi et Moi ring // Pyrrha Carpe Noctem ring // Arcana Obscura sword earrings // Rituel de Fille Inner Glow Crème Pigment