2020
20 Things (You Never Asked) About Me
categories: unquiet things
1. I used to think that little people lived in my stomach and their village would starve to death if I didn’t eat the Wheat Chex my mother served me every morning.
2. I still believe that the inner workings of cars and computers are powered by fairies and elves.
3. I don’t care for ice cream or cake or pie or candy or cookies. But I do like a lovely crème brûlée.
4. For the years of ten through eleven I slept with a photo of Indiana Jones that I’d torn from the TV Guide.
5. I am terrified of speaking in front of crowds, but you can’t shut me up when I get in front of a camera.
6. I love to sing. My voice is not great, but I don’t think it’s awful, either.
7. I don’t dance. Not even in the house, alone.
8. When I am dreaming, and I enter a darkened room and the light switch isn’t working, that’s how I know it’s about to become a nightmare.
9. My favorite number is two and odd numbers make me a little nervous.
10. I prefer curved shapes. Sharp angles make me anxious, and I often attribute aggressive personalities to them.
11. I would rather wear darker colors but I do love a nice bright, pumpkin-y orange.
12. My sisters and I used to mingle and fraternize our Barbie dolls and Star Wars action figures. Lando Calrissian went on a ski trip with Day to Night Barbie, and things went dark when he slid down a treacherous slope into our trash can (at least we thought that’s where he went) but we couldn’t find him afterward and he was never seen again.
13. I get very upset when I think about my sisters and I not recognizing each other in the next life.
14. My favorite scent is fresh marjoram.
15. My least favorite smell is bubblegum.
16. I can’t even be around people who are chewing gum, I have to leave the room.
17. I like it when older ladies call me honey or sweetheart or darling. I almost yearn for it. Probably because I miss my mother and my grandmother. Conversely, I hate it when men call me those things.
18. In order of things I like to do best: putter in the kitchen, knit, read, watch movies. I feel like if I never did anything but these four things, it would still be a pretty great life.
19. I have strong opinions about people who drizzle ketchup all over their french fries before they even start eating them. I actually have kind of strong opinions on ketchup, in general. On it’s own, it tastes like a mouthful of barf. It needs to be partnered with mustard.
20. I once told a group of people that when I die I would like my body to be expertly butchered and barbecued and served to those I loved most, with a variety of delicious dipping sauces. I can’t think of a more lovely way to be remembered. Dipping sauces are the best.
Shay N. says
1-6, 11-14, 17, 18 (sooooo much 18), & 20 (bwahahaha) These are all things I wish I had asked and also infinite reason I love you SOOOOOOO much. You are a soul sister and a lovely friend.
S. Elizabeth says
Aw, same, SAME. Much love always for my Shana <3
Harlow Skalwold says
I want to do one too! I will base it off yours...
1. My mother served us plain Cheerios every morning for so long that I couldn't eat them for years after moving out of the house. Now I will only eat the seasonal pumpkin spice Cheerios.
2. I believe cars are deeply flawed machines meant to suck up your money and destroy the environment because of precedents set by Henry Ford that continue to this day. I saw 3 Teslas on the road on my way to work today and finally felt a little relief.
3. I love sweets, especially chocolate. Because of my fructose malabsorption issue, I often feel deprived.
4. Until I was 13 I slept with my stuffed animals carefully positioned around me on my headboard to protect me while I slept.
5. I am terrified of speaking in front of crowds, and I'm not great on camera. One of the most difficult things was dealing with 3 days of filming for the Oddities tv show.
6. I have wanted to take singing lessons since college.
7. I sometimes break out in dance in the middle of the grocery store if a groovy song comes on.
8. My best dreams are about the zombie apocalypse, which I suppose most people would consider nightmares.
9. My favorite number is 8.
10. I very rarely consider the psychology of shapes and I am bad at composition in my art.
11. I prefer to wear black, but purple is actually my favorite color.
12. I played with robots and plush Ewoks as a child. I once cut my sister's Barbie's hair into a punk rock/Cyndi Lauper hairdo and colored it in with marker.
13. I really want reincarnation to be a thing.
14. My favorite scent is lilac.
15. My least favorite smell is coconut tanning lotion.
16. I can’t stand loud chewers. Mouth noises make me upset and angry and I want to punch the person causing me such distress.
17. I find it endearing when older ladies or diner waitresses call me honey or sweetheart or darling. Conversely, I hate it when men call me those things, because they should know better.
18. Things I like to do best: stay up too late researching something random, nap with a cat on top of me, get absorbed in creating my art, and lounging (with a cat).
19. I have strong opinions about people who drizzle ketchup all over their french fries before they even start eating them. Fries should be dipped. My favorite ketchup is from Portland, OR. I have had friends ship me bottles of it.
20. I have no desire to eat human meat, ever. But I do think getting regular blood transfusions from young, healthy adults is a great idea. I would also get a vampire facial if I had a disposable income. I have no idea if they work, but I love ghoulish beauty.
S. Elizabeth says
OMG I LOVE THIS SO MUCH. Thank you for sharing a little bit about yourself! Purple is my favorite color, too :)
Harlow Skalwold says
I really loved learning all these little odd things about you, and it was such a good outline to riff off of!
Also, purple is amazing.
liz t says
I feel 17 HARD. We have tons of clients who are elderly women and I love it so much when they call me "sweetie" or "dear" over the phone. I also find myself trying to go the extra mile for them... which I didn't realize until just now... Starting therapy next week is going to be INTERESTING!
S. Elizabeth says
Ahahaha! I'm one of those people who saves little tidbits like this up for my therapist, so by the time I get there, I have a list of things to talk about and we're not sitting around in weird, uncomfortable silence.
liz t says
i'll have to get a note pad for specifically these things, ha.